Tim Riggins and Texarkana

Over the past week, I hopped a plane back to the greatest place on earth (TEXAS) and got to see some of my favorite of all people and also got the privilege of losing at least 5 pounds in sweat. Luckily I had no problem making up for that deficit and more by eating my weight in every type of meat possible cooked on the grill, thanks to my oldest broskie, Kaleb – our family’s personal chef. The vacation came at a perfect time and was much needed, and I couldn’t have been happier to spend time with the people I love so dearly.

I got to see Becca Feagin and eat the most fantastic sandwich of my life, and then stay in Beef’s new house in Dallas like a real life housewife. I even did dishes! Note: staying at the HOUSE (including husband/backyard/dog/casseroles/matching dishes) of your childhood friend is one of the weirdest things to experience in my life to date. SHE MADE A CASSEROLE, Y’ALL! A CASSEROLE! That is some serious grown-up stuff.

Anyways, I talked with Becca for hours and was, as always, incredibly encouraged, and then I laughed with Beef all night long eating her casserole and reminisced about the days when we lived within driving distance, or biking distance. I ached to spend more time with each of them, and it only made my heart hurt more to have to leave so abruptly. Vacations never last long enough. And being in Texas never fails to confuse my sense of reality.

The rest of my time in the great state was spent in Texarkana alongside the idiots that I call family - the most incredible group of crazies that I know and the people whom I love most in this world. They are the BEST. Let me tell you. I got to see my youngest broskie, Roman, pitch the winning game of the Regional SemiFinal baseball game, and then got to post his picture all over social networking sites. I got to listen to Carson play guitar and sing songs and laugh and be the same exact 18 year old that I once was, and swelled with pride over how similar we are. And then feel nauseous about it. I got to stay up all night talking to my best friend on the planet, in the form of my littlest sister, and then fall asleep on her as she took me back to the airport. I remembered how much I adore her, and how we have more fun than any two people, ever. I sat in the swing on the back porch haven with Mom, Trudy and Grandmommy surrounded by entirely too many dogs and enjoyed the Texas heat. Was showered with love and got to once again admire the work that God is doing in and through each of them. And then every night I got to sit at a table eating the most delicious food that Kaleb had grilled and laugh with him about everything that’s crazy in this world.

Carson and Roman had a redneck graduation party out at the ranch and despite the fact that my mom wore pink sparkly toms, everything else was definition rural Texas. We decorated everything with antlers. ANTLERS. And mason jars. You never know how much you miss a lifestyle until it is no longer your lifestyle. And I do love me some antlers.

We played disc golf. We got snowcones. We went to Icehouse. We played shuffleboard. We drove the jeep with the top down. We hammocked. We ate too much. We sweated. We cuddled pups. We watched movies, and we watched about 239084 hours of FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS – the best TV show in the Universe, to date. And I drooled over Tim Riggins.

It’s weird being in the place where I grew up, and looking around to discover that (right now) this isn’t my reality. Texas is a memory, a place of comfort and security and happiness overflowing, but at the time is not the place to which God has called me. It is weird to look around at the people who know the depths of my soul, and to get on a plane to fly what seems like a million miles away from them. It’s weird, and it’s frustrating.

But, last night, as I flew back to my life here in Denver, I was met with 4 of the most amazing of friends. My family here. My little crew of crazy people. And I know that, for now, God has me exactly where he wants me. Because he is good. And he is in control. And I kind of love him for it. Because I kind of love it here. For now, at least.

Here is a photo documentation of my time in Texas that I basically never wanted to end.

This last picture here is Roman's debut on the front page of the sports section in today's paper.  HE'S FAMOUS YALL!!!!!!!!  Good luck to the Hawks tonight as they hope to clinch another State appearance for PG baseball.  And good luck of course to the cutest side-armed pitcher in the whole wide world.  (Read: ROMAN)  Clear eyes, full hearts, CANT LOSE!!

The Good Life

Life has been a box of freakin’ chocolates lately, and ‘I’m loving it’. (Trademark: McDonalds) Yeah I just quoted McDonalds. I’M VULNERABLE. And as of just now, embarrassed.

Let’s start again.

The other day, I was looking for easy ways to be happier. Simple changes. Things that don’t require a prescription. I found quite a few. Apparently, little things like making your bed every morning or watching less TV can boost happiness. But I wanted something I might actually try.

OKAY, one more time.

The past few weeks have made me realize why I love Colorado and my friends and life here. The only exception is that Lee is avoiding me/us. We haven’t seen him in like…4 days. He probably has some crap excuse like he was “hanging out with his friend that he only sees once every 2 years” but I’m not buying it. Lee is a pathological liar. Everyone else (completely excluding Lee) has been totally cool.

Take Sunday for instance. It rained. Rainy, cold Sundays are for crafting and baking.

…That might have been the most blatant lie I have ever posted on this blog.

Rainy, cold Sundays are actually for watching TV shows and movies between naps, pleased to finally have an excuse not to leave the house. This Sunday was no different except that we had to add in a trip to the airport to pick Lindsay up from her last minute Texas wedding extravaganza. (An event that I am still quite offended that I was not invited to, regardless of the fact that I don’t remember the names of the newly wedded couple who I have never met.)

Also, Karla basically cut her finger off while preparing lunch.

That’s an exaggeration, but she did stab herself THROUGH the skin of an avocado and we had to take her to the ER. And by ER, I mean a crying Karla and I sat in the living room as I held back vomit and bandaged her finger and then wrapped it in a paper towel. I was the only person at home so I really had to step up. I totally nailed it. The whole thing ended up being a pivotal moment in my life because for the first time, I became acutely aware that when my future children have bloody injuries - I actually do have the capacity to not demand that they stay away from me in fear of my impending nausea.

Thankfully, Rebecca got home soon after to completely dismantle my paper towel splint and put something on there that might actually work. Conclusion: Rebecca is the best during emergencies.

Besides that, it was a typical rainy Sunday. We watched ‘Crazy Stupid Love’ and ate Tokyo Joe’s while lounging on the couch. I napped somewhere in there. And that’s basically it. Call me crazy (most people that know me would) but that is my definition of a great day.

Some important things to note:

I saw The Avengers. And since we all know that the only thing I love more than TV is the movies, I loved it. Mostly because of Robert Downey Jr. I am totally in love with him.

LEE CHRISTOPHER MICHAEL (3 first names) HAS A BIRTHDAY THIS WEEKEND!! I won’t mention his age because I have kind of taken the age jokes over the top as of lately. But old is old. Ah hell with it, he is drawing really close to AARP and I googled “gifts for elderly people” trying to brainstorm ideas. Come May 19, please send him text messages, but please do not get angry with him if he is slow to respond. This kind of technology is all really new to him, and it’s likely that his vision is failing.

I am listening to country music in preparation for my upcoming (hallelujah) TEXAS VACATION.

The State Track Meet is this weekend. GO VALOR!

**Lindsay Behnke is a volunteer for a refugee camp and is hosting a “Photographic Storytelling project by refugee women in Denver.” If you live in Denver, you totally need to check it out. Website here: http://www.refugeecrafts.com/ You should be most excited for the ethnic dances. From what I hear, Lindsay will be dressed in traditional Bhutanese garb showcasing American ethnic dance moves (pop, lock, drop / stanky leg). COME!

I started running again. It sucks the same amount! Nothing has changed!


Okay that’s really all I have. I cannot think of a single other thing to list. See you guys on the flipside.

***BREAKING***: Lee Michael just used the term “sumbitch” as in: the southern slang for “son of a bitch” while texting me. And with that, I must admit…Lee—I miss you.

Mother's Day

Technically the definition of me as a small child was: “selfish and loud force (much like a tornado) that will destroy your house and a large portion of your social life, while constantly demanding food, your attention, and an endless stream of praise/affirmation ” …and Betsy still thought I was worth the hassle. This is reason enough to celebrate Mother’s Day. Surviving me was an accomplishment.

To fully appreciate Betsy Brown-Rice (my lovely mom), I have compiled a list of some of my favorite memories that we have shared throughout my short 24 years.

1. THE SEX TALK: Bets and I both could probably agree on how little we BOTH wanted to talk about it, but when Haley Burson told me you had to have to have sex in order to have kids...I was shell-shocked and needed someone to disprove this horrifying news. To my knowledge, you said a prayer and God would give you a kid when He knew you were ready for one. So naturally I asked Betsy to clear things up. The conversation began and right there in her bathroom, my mom and I buckled up because regardless of how much it was going to suck…this shit was going to happen. Anyways, long story short – I ended up crying in my closet and my mom lost the privilege of speaking to me for the rest of the week.

2. LUNCH BOX: Everyone at PGMS would unanimously agree that I had the best sack-lunches. My mom would put sandwich ingredients into separate baggies to assemble at lunchtime so that my sandwich would not get soggy. Also I had a full plastic baggy of sugar to dip my fresh strawberries into…which come to think, may actually be part of the reason I have a sugar addiction to this day. Anyways on top of it all, Bets would leave a handwritten note of some sort, which was sweet and also helped me to fake her signature on permission slips and to disprove Santa Claus later in life.

3. PREGNANCY AND CURFEW: As a kid, I had a strict curfew to which I never abided. My excuses were very innocent usually, like ‘I was jumping off Britton’s roof into her pool.’ Anyways, it was the rule that when I got home, I had to come and tell mom that I was home safe. That usually ended in her bursting into my room in a panic later that night at 3AM and shaking me to make sure I wasn’t dead. That actually happened when I was a baby, and is only slightly exaggerated for my teenage years. So, to remedy the problem, I started saying “Mom, its Allyson - your first born daughter. I’m home. It’s 10:30 (lie...it was 11) and its FRIDAY. Do you comprehend this?” The best response I ever got was “Okay, honey…go and tell your sister that you are pregnant.”

What was shocking about this was both that I was clearly not pregnant at age 15, but also that she seemed so casual and nonchalant about my breaking this news to a 12 year old Brittney. Which I promptly did: “Britt, mom said to tell you I am pregnant. Goodnight.” She handled it surprisingly well.

4. RICE RABBITS: Betsy, at what I can only assume was an early-mid-life-crisis, thought that having a dog in our home wasn’t enough. (This would later work itself out in having MULTIPLE DOGS OF THE SAME BREED IN OUR HOUSE. How many you may ask?  SIX. Which by definition is hoarding.) In this case, and in order to have the complete childhood experience package, we apparently needed bunnies. BUNNIES! So we adopted Clover, Thumper, and Fluffy. Fluffy was Carson’s rabbit and he suffered from post-traumatic-stress-disorder after Carson played catch with him when he was a baby…but that’s a different story.

Let me tell you something about bunnies….they poop every 5 seconds. And they pee all over each other, which becomes very obvious when they have white fur. And when your friends come over, you have to take them to see the rabbits in the new outdoor cage (with a polka dotted sign that read “Rice Rabbits”) and the bunnies will poop and pee on everything and then look at you with their floppy ears like “OMG ISN’T THIS AWESOME?! WHO ARE YOUR FRIENDS!!?”

…Skip to the end of the story - you will send them away to live on a ‘farm.’

5. FAMILY VACATION: My family is very fond of the beach. On the strict contrary, my family is not fond of luxury traveling. We choose to instead pile every human being alive into a single vehicle, and drive from dawn to dusk, or until our legs fall off from cramping, or until someone kills someone else. It’s the Brown-Rice WAY. Anyways, on one particular year, we set out for the beach (8 people, one vehicle) without any sort of direction as to how to get there. Because of course we would. We got about an hour into our drive, when my mom looked over and said “Do you know where we are going? Because I don’t.” It hadn’t occurred to anyone that we should bring a map or at the very least – print off directions from mapquest. (Keep in mind this is before smart phones).  "All I know is that we were supposed to go East."  BRILLIANT.


All kidding aside, Betsy did THE BEST job at being a mom, because none of us turned into dangerous sociopaths, and none of us have died under her watch (so far). Not to mention, she is the sole reason that we are not complete selfish idiots.  I suspect that she might be the best mom in the world based on her kindness, selflessness, and sheer capacity for unconditional love.  And because she raised ME.  Without going completely insane.  *NOTE: I am not entirely sure how much of her superhuman patience was out of love, and how much was simply self-preservation from the psychotic episodes of both me and my father.

Anyways, it is my recommendation that we take this entire weekend (and the rest of our damn lives - Brittney, Carson - Im looking at you) to appreciate Betsy Brown-Rice for everything that she did, does, and is doing. Because she is really a rockstar.

Happy Mother's Day MOM!  You are ALWAYS deeply loved and only sometimes deeply crazy (and with that, we've finally found our common denominator).  Truly, we wouldn't know what to do without you!!  Do something crazy this weekend. Because YOU are the boss of YOU.

To read more reasons to love Betsy, check out my blog from this time last year:  Found HERE

24 Years Later

24 years later and not that much has changed.  Some things I still have in common with myself include (but are not limited to) the following list.

1. I still wear awesome costumes to parties:

2. Still think eating healthy is the bane of my existence.

3. Still obviously very lady-like:

4. I still love birthday cake, being the center of attention, blowing out candles, and having all my friends in one place:

5. I still listen to all the best music:

6.  It still feels good to be a gangsta:

7. STILL HAVE GREAT (Texas-style) HAIR!  Still have a love-hate relationship with bangs.

8. I still have impeccable style (sweat pants) and fairly consistent hygiene habits.

 9. I still love piggy back rides, and usually laugh louder than whats socially acceptable:

10.  I still despise purses, but rock a backpack:

 11. I still don't want no scrubs:

12.  Still really love nature and being outside...quickly turning into a Colorado tree-hugger:

13. I still am extremely prideful about being from TEXAS:

14. I am still unbelievably accident prone, sometimes ending in a scabbed (or broken) nose.  Also, still got it artistically and have the capability to look like a different race when exposed to the sun:

15. Still hate cats:

16. I still love summertime, road trips, and traveling....even in very retro campers:

17. I still severely over-react to great birthday presents:

 18. Still like to wear matching clothes with Britt.  Still prefer off brand yoga pants:

19. Still actually find it quite easy being cheesy. Still think this bald baby is the greatest person to grace this earth:

20.  Still absolutely freakin' nuts and a total wack job...not looking to change anytime soon:

Lets do this, 24.  Bring it on. 

Blog Hiatus Concluded

After a month-long blogging hiatus, I am back and with even less to say. Some things that have happened include: me doing the same thing that I do every day, for about 4 weeks now. Oh, breaking news: I went to a party on a weekend and I wore a floral dress, so that is a new accomplishment both because I dressed like a girl on purpose and also because I made the conscious decision to leave the house on a Saturday night instead of fall asleep at 8PM watching “Friday Night Lights” after an all-day track meet. It was a triumph and I rewarded myself with watching TV all day the next day while laying around and eating full bags of chips. Victory. Is. Mine.

 My adventurous lifestyle came to a screeching halt upon accepting job #2, but only for a short period of time. It has been worth every single minute, but I don’t have as much to write about now that the crew is no longer planning a weekend trip to the mountains every Friday/Saturday. Snowboard season is over, and Rebecca made us take down the Lee-shrine in our living room. Curses. I am knee deep in responsibility and life is moving along with brutal swiftness. (Alas, summer is near!)

 Some other notable updates:

I read Matt Chandler’s new book, “The Explicit Gospel” and naturally, loved it. It’s a lot like a compilation of all his sermons and the Good Lord knows I love a good Matt Chandler sermon. I am once again left blown away by the majesty of my God. And even more baffled as to how I could constantly wonder away from Him on a daily basis. I could drown in my inadequacy and yet God’s grace stretches further still.

I’ve done laundry approximately 4 times in the last month, and each time I pile the clean clothes from the dryer on my bed like a strange trophy made of mostly sweatpants. It’s like a prize I give to myself for my personal achievement of cleaning my own clothes. And then, because I sleep very violently - like I am being strangled - all the clean clothes wind up on the floor and I end up raging angry in the mornings when I can’t find my black tights.

 I cannot tell you how close I am to going crazy while doing the career thing. It’s exhausting. I am at the point in my full time job where I wish my co-worker, Lindsay, would set fire to the place in order to distract everyone as I snuck out to (once again) take a nap in my car. But she won’t do that because Lindsay is very unhelpful.

 Speaking of, Lindsay Behnke is now officially my co-worker, and that makes me a little less likely to drive my car into the side of the building so as to escape the 9-5 routine. In her own words, she is running this workplace like a gerbil runs in a plastic ball in his cage. I couldn’t be more proud of her. 

Tried Greek food, again. Liked it.

 Tried other forms of sushi. Hated it.

 IMPORTANT: I discovered two new artists, with the help of my littlest sister and Lee(balls). Please do yourself a favor and download Ben Howard’s entire album “Every Kingdom” and The Lumineers self-titled album. It will be the best thing you do this week. My favorites are “Old Pine,” “Keep your Head Up” and “Ho Hey.” Its…just….phenomenal.

I’ve gotten quite a few phone calls lately from telemarketers asking me if I want things that I would never in a million years ever want. But what concerns me more than anything is that these robotic jerks don’t even start the conversation with a “hello.” (Which is upsetting to me because a greeting is a basic building block of polite society and is one of the only things that separate us from bears.) And not to mention, no I do not want a magazine subscription – I cannot stress this enough. My nemesis may or may not be behind this.

 I planned a trip home to Texas in May and also planned for 3 out of 4 sibs to come and visit me in Denver in June. Both are big events that I am counting down the minutes to in antsy anticipation.


With all of those updates behind us, I can feel free to tell you that I have kind of been in a fog. A haze, if you will. I am right at the cusp of my 24th birthday and I am really hoping that this isn’t my quarter-life crisis rearing its head a year too early.

 Life, to my utter annoyance, is designed to move forward. We aren’t created to stand still, to be stagnant, or to hover. Also, there is no chance of going back to the “good old days.” I’m not particularly a fan of this consistent change. I constantly feel the need to hang onto what has suddenly become the past. Nothing exemplified this horror more than the day after Beef's wedding. However, change is inevitable. People get married, have kids, and move across the country (my fault). And this current, breathless moment will never be quite the same.

 But in times like these when I feel like life is whirling past me at a million miles an hour, I can skype my friend Beef and laugh until my stomach hurts about the pains of growing up, gaining weight, and being 24...and suddenly, for this moment - everything is going to be okay. Because God sends mercy and grace in the form of friendships and video chatting.

 Thank you Brittany Forrester for making me laugh until I cry and for hanging out with me (virtually) when It was exactly what I really needed.